A Blog by Jason Salamun

Recently, I had the opportunity to pray at center ice of a local pro hockey game in front of 4500 people.

It was a sweet moment.

As I was waiting by the penalty box listening to the National Anthem, I thought, “Why me?”

With the chill of the ice beneath my feet and the chill of the goosebumps on my arms as the young gal sang, “of the land and of the freeeeee” I was dumbfounded how I got to this point.

How did I go from sitting on the sidelines of life watching others live their dreams to playing in the game and living mine?

Why me?

I’m just an ordinary guy.

Just five years ago I was content to have a good job, take care of my family, go to church, try to be a decent person, and live a comfortable life.

Until God disturbed me.

He filled me with a passion to help people live free.

And I know the only path to true freedom is the gospel.

The gospel produces community who are on a mission to make disciples.

Followers of Jesus who love God, love people, & live free.

The gospel was the seed that birthed Project Church.

And somehow, someway God called me to be a part of this.

Why me?

There are certainly better people God could have chosen.

Better pedigree.

Better leaders.

Better communicators.

Better looking.

You name it.

Some people feel the need to point out how unimpressive I am.

Too much this, not enough that.

So and so is better.

I already know.

I’m just a dude.

But I’m a dude who really loves Jesus.

I’m a dude who really wants you to live free.

To know the Jesus that I know.

To taste the grace that I’ve tasted.

To experience the freedom that I’m experiencing.

Why me?

Perhaps my life will be proof that there is a God.

Because if he can use me, he can use anybody.

That includes you!

So here’s to The Ordinaries like me.

Like Peter and John before us, may anything extraordinary we do be because we had been with Jesus.

May he always be the extra in our ordinary.

May we always remember that.

At Project Church we value authenticity.  We give one another permission to not pretend to be any more or any less than we really are.

As a leader I know that if we’re going to create a community of openness and honesty then it begins with me. Pastors aren’t professional Christians, we’re proof that a perfect God calls and uses imperfect people for his purposes.

I have weaknesses just as much as anyone.  Allow me to share a couple:

Authenticity doesn’t come easy for me
I have a tendency to put on the face that people want to see. I want to give others freedom to be real but don’t often give myself that same freedom.  This is why it’s good that I’m part of a church that keeps it real because they challenge me to do the same.  They help me in my recovery from hypocrisy.

I’m fiercely independent
We live in a culture that values independence but I’m learning that it’s overrated.  Early on in my life I felt that the only person I could depend on is myself.  Getting married really helped me to discover the beauty in harmony as you intertwine your life with another.  Being in a church as shown me how much more effective people are when they latch on to something bigger than themselves.  My community helps me learn to depend on others and see that life’s about more than what I can accomplish alone.

Authentic community helps protect me from my natural inclination to be a lone-ranger Christian.  We’re so much better together than we are apart.  God was on to something when he built the church.  Go figure.  We aren’t meant to do life alone.  We’re meant to journey through life together and help each other live the lives we’re meant to live.

These two values (authenticity and community) aren’t born out of the strenghs of the leader (me). They are rooted in scripture, provide guardrails for our church, and guide me out of my weakness.

As I observed strangers become friends, I cried.

As I witnessed friends become family, I cried.

As I watched authenticity from the stage, I cried.

As I realized I am part of something bigger than me, I cried.

As I saw the gospel lived out, I cried.

As I opened my eyes to what God is doing, I cried.

I am so thankful to be a part of a community where we don’t have to pretend to be more or less than we really are.

I’m so thankful to be a part of a community who are centered on Christ, driven by the gospel, guided by scripture, and rooted in love.

I’m so thankful to be a part of a community who are on a mission to love God and people.

Thank you God for letting me be a part of this and thank you Project Church for being this kind of church.

Much love.

Click here to listen to this week’s message

Thoughts on authenticity from a message I gave titled, “Posers Like Me: Confessions of a Recovering Hypocrite.”

As I wrestled through how (or if) I should teach on authenticity I realized that I needed to take a different angle. Rather than merely teach on what authenticity is, I needed to open up and be authentic myself.  If we, as a church, are going to be a people who take off our masks, I know it begins with me taking off mine.

It was not easy to admit many of these things publicly- but if we’re not willing to be real with God, ourselves, and each other, then we’re just playing church, not being the church. And I, for one, have no interest in playing church.

So, for better or for worse, here are some confessions I shared at our gathering last week:

If I’m honest, I would tell you that I struggle with being authentic.
I care too much about what other people think. I find it uncomfortable to open up and be transparent. Vulnerability and I don’t get along too well. I know who I am- but have difficulty letting other people in. I’m guarded- too guarded.

If I’m honest, I would tell you that I am a hypocrite.
Too often putting a smiley face on when I’m actually struggling. Too often appearing confident when I often feel inadequate. Too often saying the right things but thinking something else. Too often acting self-sufficient when I really need someone to talk to.

If I’m honest, I would admit what I fear.
I fear failure, rejection, and clowns. This means I can’t go in public, have conversations, or go to the circus without a being afraid of something. God, with purpose and humor, seems to find ways for me to come face to face with these fears all the time.

If I’m honest, I would reveal that I don’t always deal with stress appropriately.
This is why I can feel alone in a crowded place. This explains why my weight goes up and down more times than gas prices. This is why I show my displeasure with minor things when it’s the major ones I’m ticked off about.

If I’m honest, I would tell you that my actions are self-centered- and I hate it!
Selfishness calls with comfort. I get stuck in ruts and conform way too much to the me-first pattern of this world. When I put myself in the center, everything is out of alignment. This is the worst of all sins. It’s idolatry. And I am guilty of it.

All that said, my prayer is for a life of authenticity. That a light will shine on all corners of my life. That I not become what I hate- a poser or a fake. That I become what God wants me to be- genuine and real. That Jesus always be central in my life. And while I’m imperfect, I want to grow up and be like him.

Authenticity is the beginning of growth.