Don’t Give Up!
Several months ago I was on the verge of tapping out on church planting.
This has been my dream and my passion and I was on the edge of ending it.
Between the consumer Christians and their “What can this church do for me?” mentality to the critics from other churches and their gossip and biting words to the discouragement that comes with disappointments and let downs to the physical smackdown I was experiencing as the left side of my upper body progressively lost feeling and led to atrophy. (Note: my recent surgery corrected this)
These factors and more had me clinched in a triangle choke hold.
One evening was particularly bad. At the end of December, I invited a number of people from our community to my home to dream and pray about the upcoming year. My hopes were high but it turned out to be a disaster.
As people showed up, I got violently ill yet still tried to power through a discussion about where we’ve been and where we’re going. Frankly, I was in no shape to lead that discussion and it quickly turned tense as heads butted, feelings were hurt, and eventually, I had to cut our time short because of my condition. People quickly left (because it’s awkward when your host is hurling loudly in the toilet) and I was sitting on the bathroom floor sick, sad, and in tears.
I was at the end of myself.
For the first time since we began this journey, I entertained the thought of calling it quits.
It’s in moments like this where scripture such as, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” become more real than ever.
Sometimes being at the end of yourself isn’t such a bad place to be.
This is what God has been teaching me in the past few months.
Soon after, my wife and I decided to have a date night at Borders where we enjoyed a drink, a book, and sat and read together. I grabbed a book titled, “Leading on Empty” by Wayne Cordeiro. I devoured it in one sitting. In the book, Cordeiro shares stories of his struggles and some tips and habits he’s learned along the way. This book prompted me to make a few changes to increase margin in my life and enlarge my capacity to serve my church.
In February, I went on a planned two-week tour to Washington DC, Atlanta, GA, and Knoxville, TN for conferences, connections, and to speak. During this time, God used several people to speak into my life. From Dallas Willard’s reminder that, “God is in charge of the outcomes” to Rick Warren’s advice over lunch on how to handle criticism to the encouragement I received at KnoxLife Church, all of it added fuel to my dwindling spark.
Not to mention conversations with many, many friends along the way and reading Donald Miller’s book, “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years” at just the right time.
Ultimately, it was time spent alone with God that prevented me from tapping out and gave me the strength to counter the choke hold I was in. I began to see four clear reasons to not give up:
Jesus
While praying in the garden before his arrest, Jesus was as close as he had ever been to rock bottom. So much so he was sweating blood and asking God if it was possible to “let this cup pass” from him. Yet he pressed on knowing it was God’s will. “He who knew no sin, became sin, so that in him, we might become the righteousness of God.” Jesus never gave up! Because he never gave up for me, how could I give up on him?
Calling
I wrestled for several years on my calling to start a church and many times, it’s the only thing that has kept me going. If I was not called, I would have tapped out long ago. But when you’re called, you press on because you must. When you’re called, you will do whatever it takes because it’s worth it. The fact is, to not start and lead this church would be disobedient and I can’t live with that. I love that God called me to this!
Friends
I am incredibly blessed to have wonderful friends both near and far. I often say that our church is where strangers becomes friends and friends become family. I’m so thankful I’m not some lonely pastor somewhere who has no genuine friendships. I have that and more. I have a family.
I’ve made it my goal, my project, to join God in his mission in this world and there are incredible people who are on this journey with me. We spur one another on and make sure we fix our eyes on what matters most. So to my friends at Project Church, thank you and I love you. To my friends around the world who are a source of prayer, encouragement and wisdom, thank you and I love you.
Fruit
Finally, I could not tap out because of what God is doing in and through us. Too many people have experienced the grace of God through Project Church. Too many people have taken their first and next steps in following Jesus because of our start-up church. Too many people are a part of genuine community because of what we’re doing. Marriages have been restored, broken hearts are being put back together, complacent lives are being put in motion, Jesus is being made much of, and the enslaved are finding freedom. When I take a step back and see what God is doing, I’m in awe. He is renewing all things and letting us be a part of that. How cool is that? And we’re just getting started.
Why am I sharing this?
Not so you will feel sorry for me. As you can see, I’m blessed beyond measure.
But somewhere, someone is wanting to give up. On their marriage, their dream, their lives. I believe God has led you to this blog post to tell you, “Don’t Give Up!”
Things are terribly hard but don’t give up!
The mountain looks too big but don’t give up!
You’ve got nothing left to give but don’t give up!
God doesn’t always get us around these times but he has promised to see us through them. It’s by going through these times we become more like him and more like the us we always wanted to be.
Don’t give up my friend.
And should you ever feel like giving up, go here for the inspiration to press on.




